She's upset about eating meat, how do I help her?

My daughter has been a vegetarian for over 4 years. She is the only one in the family that is. After a long day of Christmas shopping, we went through a Taco bell drive through. I ordered her a stuffed burrito, which I specified in detail. No meat!! Beans only because my daughter is a vegetarian. When I got my order I confirmed with them that it was a special order - no meat. They said yes. We got home %26amp; began to eat. About 4 bites into the burrito, my daughter jumps up %26amp; runs to the bathroom %26amp; starts puking. I ran in to check on her %26amp; she starts crying hysterically there was meat in her burrito. I told her to calm down, its no big deal, she'll be ok. But she was crying for hours, that I don't understand. She's right I don't understand. Now this a.m., she's still upset %26amp; cant eat. What can I do to help her. I'm at a loss here. Are there any other vegetarians out there that have had this happen? How did you get over it?

She's upset about eating meat, how do I help her?
OK Sorry, I thought long and hard on this one and I am completely changing my answer. It is terrible to see all these people write sue Taco Bell or call the newspaper. Yes, Taco Bell is owned by the evil YUM Foods empire but they are one of the few places that will allow you to have all menu items prepared vegan/vegetarian without a hassle. This is one of the reasons so many of us go to Taco Bell even though we detest YUM. If you go to McDonalds or Burger King, you will get a very limited menu with few options. Yes, Taco Bell has put meat into my food in error and I usually find out the hard way after chomping on dead animal carcass. Every time I have brought back an item that has meat in it (sometimes hours later) they are very glad to replace it and even offer a free drink and an apology from time to time. I am glad that they use cheese without rennet and beans without lard. I wonder how many times I have ordered something like a vegetarian burrito and found myself eating lard or rennet often without even knowing it. The only thing she can realisticly do is take the item back and demand a new one. Taco Bell is out to make money and if they have to keep replacing food like this, they will pay more attention. Also, everytime you go in a place like that and order vegetarian, you are voting with your dollars. If more people demand vegetarian foods in places like this, they will have to change. If your daughter really doesnt want to take any chances she will have to order stuff like the bean burrito, tostada or any other item that does not normally have meat in it. Anger is not going to solve the problem. People often respond to anger with violence or defensiveness and it does not go far. Our society is unfortunately, is sue happy and would rather solve their problems through lawsuits or legislation rather than using philosophical debate to try and appeal to more people. I think your daughters choice to be vegetarian is fantastic. She is doing something for her health, the animals and the environment at the same time. She sounds like a caring person who sticks by her morals and has found true compassion for others. You seem like a caring mom who really supports her daughter and you should be applauded as well. I dont think there is an easy answer for your daughter other than take the item back and let it go. You only have so much control and if you are doing everything you can do then it is fine. Hey if you are still Christmas shopping, get your daughter vegnews at www.vegnews.com. I love this magazine and it will help her deal with stuff like this tactfully.
Reply:I know how she fells (I am a vegetarian for 6 years now ) When I was at an Air Port I had to eat at a Taco Bell there and it said Bean Burrito so I ordered it and ate 5 bites and there was Cow in it. But I did not puke I busted in the back madder than a hornet and talked right to the manager and he said "did it ever say no meat"? and I said well no but that is what you would think and he said sorry now go and get meanly so I left and have never gone back again. Be sure to tell your Daughter she has saved 400 animals from death!
Reply:Your daughter isn't upset with YOU about the burrito itself. She's upset because she was lied to by Taco Bell.





I'd like for you to think about something that you would never eat, and them imagine finding that item in something that you are eating, even though you've been assured that it's not there. You'd be upset, too.





Yes. she's being a bit dramatic, but is she a "drama queen" in general? If so, then that's what's happening here.





WHen your daughter lectures you about fast food, it's her way of saying that she loves you. Next time that you're out together, though, you might try looking for someplace where you can get a salad or perhaps some falafel. That's an dish that never has meat in it.
Reply:the same thing happened to me at a Chinese restaurant...i asked the lady if the egg roll was vegetarian and she said yes but it had meat in it... she probably didn't even understand my question...





anyway...i was very upset........ i do not like being tricked or forced into eating meat! she is not being a drama queen... she is understandbly upset...





i would take her to taco bell with you and have her complain to the manager in a rational manner how eating the meat made her feel and show them the reciept that says without meat etc....





i would definitely at the very least get my money back.....





i hope she comes around to eating again soon...and has a Merry Christmas
Reply:I think having your moral values overturned (by accident) is pretty traumatic. She'll get over it though. I would use this as a great opportunity to introduce her to cook for herself. Next time get what you want at the drive-thru (bypassing Taco Bell for her sake) and let her cook for herself at home. She needs to learn ihow to cook someday anyway; and this will also also her understand how hard it is for you to accommodate her (very valid) beliefs.





Later in life she will appreciate your efforts.
Reply:Just be supportive of her, and just tell her that it isn't her fault that she ate meat. It was a mistake. And before you do anything drastic against the restaurant/chain, just think back to when you went to the drive-thru, and how busy it was/wasn't. It was probably a simple error. I would just go to the manager, and have a quiet talk with him/her, and depending on their reaction, go from there.
Reply:I am a vegitarian, I know how you feel, in preschool, My daughter ate meat, and FELT SO BAD. I just told her that she can't ever be PURE vegetarian, I mean, no matter what, your going to consume meat some how. Please support her decicision to be one. Hope she feels better
Reply:Although you (and others) may not understand her seemingly extreme reaction to accidentally eating meat, she obviously was as nauseated by it as a meat eater would be over eating something like monkey brains or raw fish or anything else that other cultures find a delicacy.


Suggest to her a cleansing tonic to rid her system of the accidental ingested meat, and some meditation to calm her spirit. Hopefully, she'll be more settled after that.





Rebecca
Reply:I can understand being upset, but it does seem that she's taking it just a tad bit over the top. It was no doubt an accident on Taco Bell's part. . .this IS a very busy time of year for everyone, including fast food places.





She's going to face a lot worse situations in this world and come to terms with them, so she needs to find a positive way to deal with this. Talking to the manager is a good start, and I hope he does the right thing by apologizing for their mistake and making some kind of restitution. But he's not apt to take her very seriously if she goes off on a hysterical crying jag.





I think she also needs to consider the fact that she "represents" the vegetarian community, as we all do. We're already ridiculed by a lot of people as a bunch of hysterical tree-huggers. If she presents her argument calmly and intelligently, she'll score points for the vegetarian lifestyle as well as her own case.





It's good that she has compassion for animals, but she probably needs to think about things from the viewpoint of a tired, overworked fast food employee who made a mistake. They deserve some understanding, too.





Edit: So what all these thumbs-downs are saying is that it's OK for the kid to pitch a ****** fit because of her "love for animals," but she doesn't need to show any compassion for the tired and overworked employee who made a mistake during the roughest time of year? I am now beginning to understand why meat eaters think that we vegetarians have our priorities bassackwards.





It's a damned shame that we can't extend the same understanding and consideration to our fellow humans as we do to animals.
Reply:I would say her reaction is a little over the top. I would probably call Taco Bell and ****** about it though. I know how it is, I also don't eat meat and it really peaves me when I get my order home and there it is...
Reply:yes, this has happened to me. I have never eaten meat except for accidentally like this and it was traumatic because I do see meat as animals ground up....not as food. I asked at the window each time to be sure it was no meat but they still get mixed up sometimes. When I order I make sure to yell out..."make sure there is no meat" instead of just saying what kind of burrito. I would not tell her to get over it or that it doesnt matter because that will not help. Maybe tell her you will check the order yourself next time and really do that. It is also a trust issue. If she is still not eating maybe ask her if you can try one of her vegetarian dishes .....have her make it and she would have to eat with you then. Good luck....just take her seriously!
Reply:im not vegitarian myself, but i do think it is a healthier lifestyle and have seriously considered going vegitarian when i move out and start to make my own meals!


not eating meat is very important to ur daughter. it was wrong for them, and the other answerers to demean what she holds to be important. what if it had been a person whose religion forbade them to eat cow meat, everyone would be outraged! Just because soemthing may not be persoanly significant to u, doesn't mean u shouldnt respect what other people find important.


tell your daughter she did nothing wrong, she did not knowingly eat meat and did not go against her principles. You should have a good talking to with the manager about respecting the wishes of the customer, and how important it is to be careful about food orders since many people can have serious allergies.


Good luck, i hope she feels better soon. ♥
Reply:Your daughter's convictiona and beliefs were violated. Had she been allergic to meat, Taco Bell would be sued. She has been wronged. Express that you understand her outrage and her being upset. I suggest you show your support telling her to go to the Taco Bell and speaking with whomever is in charge. I also suggest you write to the branch and the main headquarters. You can also have her write to the local papers expressing her outrage. Believe it or not, even the local news stations would pick-up the story, if called. If you have the receipt, I suggest you photocopy it and send a copy with all the letters.





She will get "over" the particular situation, but how she was wronged will always be a part of her memory.
Reply:well shes very sad because of this im vegetarian and i would be the same way you feel horribly bad and scared and sad becuae youve worked so hard and you love the animals so much it hurts you alot like even when u did it on accident she feels like all the years of being vegetarian hads gone to waste the best thing ot do is notjhing she will eventully calm down about but things you can do to help buy vegetarian food from walmart or target and tell her that it was taco bells fault that it happened
Reply:i would talk to taco bell manager and let them know what happend?
Reply:I would call the restaurant and ask to talk to a manager. If he/she doesn't offer to try to make it right, ask for the district manager's phone number. They need to do something to make it up to her. I'm no lawyer, but you could probably sue Taco Bell over this.
Reply:Yes..it does happen..that's why I typically avoid places like that.
Reply:I think I know EXACTLY what she's going through.


I converted to vegetarianism when I was about 13 and initially the same thing happened to me. My reason for turning vegetarian was similar to that of your daughter and I cannot tell you the agony I suffered when I once realized, that i had bitten into meat (it was a pizza that was supposed to be veggie). I puked too and was driven to a fit of fury. Nothing that my mom said could console me. It's a feeling of guilt more than anything else.





The reaction...the puking is more like an attempt to undo what's been done. She might even feel like she was somehow 'tricked' into eating meat...by fate...by conspiracy...whatever...the feeling of guilt numbs logical thinking.It's also like she feels she let herself down somehow. I know how the feeling lingers for days.


Those of you who have not experienced this feeling will not understand why she reacts this way.


If you do want to talk to her,do not say 'it's no big deal' It is a huge deal for her. It stands for something she strongly believes in. Just


keep reassuring her that you respect her decision.


But the best that you can do is let her take her own time. Try not to mention the incident in her presence. She would not like to be reminded of it.


As for me, I got over the black mood after brooding over the incident for a few days.


Hope things will sort themselves out in her mind soon.


Happy Holidays
Reply:I can relate with your daughter and I also believe that she was right in saying that you don't understand. She's been a vegetarian for as long as I have. I remember my mom telling me once that if you don't eat meat for a long time and then all of a sudden eat it you can get sick. So besides her eating the meat and thinking about the cows and such, her body could have been rejecting it. Now this happened to me once and yeah I did get a little over dramatic (seeing as I had only eating a tiny piece of meat) but I still felt a bit sick after eating it. Now when you told her that it was "no big deal" it was to her and I don't blame her to be quite honest. I would be really upset if I got a burrito in which I specified NO MEAT and then there was meat in it. I'm sorry that happened to your daughter. Just remember that she doesn't force her beliefs on you and you were forcing yours a little on her by saying "Well you used to enjoy eating meat".
Reply:Make it up to her by taking her to an all vegetarian restaurant.You and her can go together and spend time together and you can both enjoy the experience of trying something new together.That would be cool.
Reply:I guess this is a case of "out of sight, out of mind". Because if you think about it, even stuff that doesn't have meat might have been prepared with some animal based product. To be honest, as a meat eater even I don't trust Taco bell to put real meat in there let alone not use any animal based products.





I hope to God's she not being a vegetarian because she thinks it's cool. I mean, if I was one, Taco Bell would be the farthest thing from my mind.





The best thing to do would probably ask her why she's so upset. If she can't logically explain it, she doesn't understand why she freaked out either.
Reply:if you specifically ordered no meat then you could probably sue taco bell...... because she could possibly be allergic and if they give the wrong order they could have caused an allergic reactiion.
Reply:I think that there's more then just eating meat in the equation, it just happened to be the straw that broke the camel's back
Reply:Sounds like someone is a bit of a drama queen to me. Tell her to get the hell over it. People eat meat all over the world, all day every day.





If her reasons for abstaining from the wonderful world of delicious meat is that she wants to spread vegetarianism to other people in hopes of one day ridding the world of meat eaters, let her know that she has a better chance of finding the cure for cancer in a public restroom somewhere.





She's been a vegetarian for over 4 years... which I take to mean she has eaten meat willingly before without the urge to cut her own stomach out. What's the difference now?





Tell her to get the hell over it.





PS - pirulee? What the hell is wrong with you?
Reply:I sympathise with her feelings, but in truth the line between vegetarian or not is really a matter of the mind. None can be true vegetarians. Bread has yeast in it which is alive, yogourt bacteria, and you can't walk down the street without crushing little creatures with your feet. If it is for health reasons making herself vomit is more harmful than eating a little meat.


I was a vegetarian for many years, it is a healthy lifestyle but shouldn't become an obsession.





As for Taco Bell, it was probably some kid working at minimum wage and bored to death putting your order together. Yes you can tell the manager but mistakes happen, we are all human, even those of us who eat meat.
Reply:Geez, Taco Bell made a mistake! Has your spoiled drama queen daughter ever made a mistake? As far as I can tell, no real harm was done. There was no malice and forethought. It's just that some tired, minimum wage kid made your bean burrito and put it into the wrong bag. Liberals like your daughter have become used to the left-leaning media kowtowing to any special interest group that gets its feelings hurt by "big business." Trial attorneys are all to happy to jump on any rainbow that has a pot of gold at the end. But do you know who pays for it? It's not Taco Bell. It's the consumers. Wake up. Your daughter should behave like an adult, extend some grace and get over it! If she can't handle a little mistake with her Taco Bell food, she has a real wake-up call coming when she enters the real world.